Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Preparing the Big Sister

I’m reading left and right about preparing a 4-yr-old for the coming of a baby brother. Marguerite shows interest and sweetness for the baby in my belly, but I’m not sure how she’ll react when the baby comes out. He’ll have demands and be the center of attention, of course. There will be a lot of adjusting to do and some trouble to expect, I’m sure. I happen to know Marguerite doesn’t have much patience for younger kids. She loves babies, but is usually very suspicious of toddlers who don’t know how to “play right”. She thinks they spoil her fun. She definitely has to learn patience and tolerance. I’m getting her a couple of books about becoming a big sister. We’re also doing some “taking care of baby” games. I know it might backfire and I am feeling guilty about the concession, but we’re also bribing her with some things (although I’m trying hard not to think of it that way), like buying those books. I’m making her a doll sling and maybe throwing a small becoming a big sister party for her. She’ll also get a few T shirts that have a big sister theme. She’ll probably see through it, but we’ll try to keep things positive. The other thing is that we have to transition her to her own bed now months before the baby gets here, so it would be about being a big girl and she wouldn’t connect the halt of co-sleeping with the coming of the baby. Tricky time.

8 comments:

Stay at Home Blessings by Chin chin said...

It is a tricky time. I really didn't have much of a problem with my older kids accepting their new baby brother or sister. The only problem comes when both of them are demanding for something at the same time. I had to choose which I should do first. Or when 2 or more children would like to lie beside me in bed. Definitely, the baby lay beside me because I breastfed. So, transferring big sister to her own room is a good decision on your part. As for the other bribing, I just hope that it won't backfire. God bless you and your babies.

spinninglovelydays said...

Thanks, Chin chin. I can only imagine what it would be like to have four kids. :)

Nikka said...

We transferred Ty to a futon on the floor by my side of the bed so we'd (technically) still be next to each other. We surprised him with it when he got home from school. It had car sheets, his favorite pillow and a little lamp so he could have his stories in his bed instead of ours. It was great until the baby actually arrived because he wanted to sleep next to the baby then!

I Love-Hate America by Bing said...

Your family must be extra-excited now that the day is almost coming. I think she'll be fine, and she'll be a good sister.

Sharkbytes (TM) said...

Well, I'll be no help with this process since we got the two youngest in backwards order. I do recall one day when they were both upset and crying and angry. As we put them each to bed (in separate rooms) the both wailed "you love ____________ more than me!"

We were either doing something really right or really wrong!

spinninglovelydays said...

@Nikka: That's my plan too (although the M's bed won't be right next to ours, but across our small room instead)... just make her sleeping area as appealing to her as possible.

@Bingkee: Thanks! I certainly hope so.

@Sharkbytes: lol, I guess those instances have to be expected... dreading them though.

Gin E said...

My princess was just about to turn 2 when I gave birth to my second child. She wanted me to put him back in my tummy a few days after when she noticed that I'm spending more time with the baby...

What worked for us back then is to keep her involve in everything as the big sister. Because she involved in the bonding, it made things easier for her to accept her little brother.

God bless to you and your growing family.

spinninglovelydays said...

I think getting M as involved as possible is a good idea. Thanks!