Friday, September 28, 2007

My Handicap

Why do I always sound as though I'm posting about golf when I know beans about it?
I suppose I have a lot of handicaps, really, but one of them has always been "cuteness". The way I talk sometimes, you'd think I never went through childhood. At any rate, in my case, childhood was, indeed, very brief. I remember playing and being good at games, but around the second grade, asthma became my burden and playtime understandably was greatly diminished. Then, very shortly thereafter, puberty hit. I'm not sure if many would agree with me, but that crazy stage can dismiss carefree days like nothing else, especially if it came too early and unexpectedly, like in my case.
Anyway, that's how I would explain away the very meager recollections I have of juvenile joy. But then, there's TV, too. Sometimes, Husband would give me such a strange look when he chances upon a cartoon show from way back and he would watch it as eagerly as he would have twenty years ago, and I would be all, "Can't we watch something else? It's boring.". These shows apparently never stop being engaging for him, even if they're very obviously designed to entertain a child. He would always exclaim, "Didn't you watch this when you were a kid?" and I would reply,"I didn't really like cartoons." And I didn't/ don't. I thought many of them extremely annoying. I remember mildly liking Rainbow Brite, but I don't get all gushy along with the other females my age when we get to reminiscing. I don't claim to have had the toys and whatnots or to have religiously followed the show and I can't swear that I can still enumerate the whosits or go, "you remember that episode when they did this and that?"... By the way, it's not upbringing. Sister, to this day, has to have her daily dose. She would deliberately watch Mirmo, Sakura (Card Captor), Slamdunk, etc. I suppose the cartoon show I could stand watching was "The Simpsons" and they're not exactly for kids. I also find that I don't really care to see if I would like any other.
Then, there's the affinity for stuffed toys. I have no recollection of ever wanting to cuddle with one. I have pictures of myself as a toddler posing with a teddy bear, but I think that was just for the picture. There was a time when stuffed toys were the trend. Sister, always the trendier one, had masses of them. She hugged them while sleeping, her fingers rubbing some patches bald (she did this with her security blanket too), and her bed was (is, haha) liberally littered with them. Mine was littered too, but with books. I didn't cuddle with them, but I liked being cozy under a blanket and reading the night, or day, away. During the day, I liked accompanying the reading with munchies and a matching drink. And, yeah, I guess being a couch potato goes a long way back.:)
My lack of cuteness is further evidenced by lots of other things, but I really don't have time for a long post. I just want to say that I've always thought babies are cute, natch. As for baby things, I never really used to pay attention. I do now though. You'll even hear me cooing and gushing over them. Now I also watch Marguerite cuddling her stuffed toys and it's so cute, I just want to stop the time right there so I can savor the image. Maybe there's hope for me yet.

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